Photo Of The Day: 04-December-2012

A Relationship summarized in one Picture.

 The above picture summarizes almost every relationship. It starts out with the guy doing all the work, trying to win the girls heart, attention, commitment and for him to become her "one and only". At this point, He'll do anything for her, give up anything she doesn't like, make any sacrifice for her, and only her opinion matters to him, as her thought, attention and presence is worth the world to him. He'll pick new habits and drop any old habit she might not approve of.
 When she finally commits fully to him, he relaxes a little, making her put in as much effort as he is putting in. At this point, they always have to meet halfway on every issue. Here, he begins to show her the real him, which he had to bury before. They begin to spend less time together, and if they don't begin to spice up the relationship, then they are heeding for the rocks.
 The final stage is the point at which the guy has seen all there is to see, or known all about the girl, he is bored with her, and begins to look for new adventures, probably in other girls. The girl meanwhile has sacrificed a lot for the relationship, probably putting a gap between her and other guy, so as to be exclusive with her "boyfriend". In the process, she has lost a couple of friends, or had problem with her parents, family, friends, and other people who use to matter in her life. To ensure she doesn't loose everything, including her worth, self respect and dignity, she'll do everything within and even attempt beyond her strength to keep the guy loyal to her.
 A way to ensure longevity of relationships is to spend more time in the company of other friends, thereby ensuring that the time you spend together educates you on not only yourselves, but also how you relate with others as a couple. You should also be honest about your interest from the start, and get to spend time learning about each others passion, interest and hobby. Because the more time you spend doing things you each love doing before you became a couple, the more you'll love one another.
 In the main time, I'll go back to my task of finding "The One".

I'm In A Love Triangle

I hope the three of Us don't end up Like This.

Before I begin writing this Post, I'll like to say something: I actually hope two people never get to read this piece. Firstly, My Best Friend; Secondly, My Crush, who My Best-Friend happens to be interested in. On a second thought, I also hope My Wife and maybe My Children never get to read this too. because it might cause a lot of controversies in the future, especially if I can't write special piece for my wife. And Maybe My aunty, siblings, pastor and some of my co-workers never get to read this. Else this is surely gonna change their view of me.
Back to business. Over the years, I've had interest in a couple of girls, I just wanted to be more than friends with them, but with time, most of the feelings get washed away, while some of them persist, and manage to stay subdued over time.
But then, My best-friend happens to be a "ladies favorite". He meets a girl for the first time, and she falls head over heels for him. While I'm a sharp contrast to that, I'm more likely to be disliked by a lady whose just meeting me, (actually, most of the female friends I have, I meet under circumstances where we just had to get along with one another.)
One thing I'm happy about is that My friend (Let's call him "T" for the purpose of this discussion, except you read my previous piece on Him) doesn't "Over Use" this to his advantage. He respects these girls, treats them right, and tries to be best of friends with as many of them as possible.
Just like every other guy out there, T also has feelings for a number of this girls, Two of them actually, until recently when He meet a third one, who He has been crazy about (Which is very uncharacteristic of Him.)
I'll tell you more about the other girls, and His own dilemma in dealing with them some other times, but today, I'm gonna talk about only one of them. (Let's call her "F" just for the purpose of this discussion, except if you know the three of us personally, in which case I'll most probably be in big trouble).
I'll start right from the genesis of this whole palaver (i actually didn't know palaver is a correct English word until I checked my dictionary, I thought it was pidgin).
I started senior secondary school about a month later than most of my peers, then I was posted to a wrong class for over half of the academic session. When eventually I was transferred to the right class, I noticed a couple of things about this class (I'll write about it sometimes in the future.) and It was actually impossible not to notice this young, confident and vibrant young boy. I was actually sat right behind him, and we became friends. I also noticed this girl who always had a beret on, (Which was kinda uncommon in our class back then). She was beautiful, and had this lovely smile which was infectious.
The boy was "T" while the girl was"F". Before the end of our first year of school, there were lots of hook-ups in our class, as we had begun to notice the characters of each other, and get to know each other better.
"T" and "F" were mutually attracted to one another, but didn't exactly go into an official relationship, although they were as good as being a couple. They were even closer and more cute than most known couple in the class back then. But then, instead of openly showing affection for one another, they'll engage in public argument, and consistently take opposing sides on almost every discussion, but the chemistry between them was very visible to everyone.
After we finished secondary school, I, "T" and "F" got closer than before, and they still didn't have any official relationship, although they both admitted to having feelings for one another.
As I and "F" got closer, I began to have feelings for her, as I began noticing more positive sides of her, and I'll admit, she got even more beautiful (I don't know how that's even possible, because she was already too beautiful before.)
I believed if I leave this feeling unattended to, it will die a natural death, but each time we talked, chat, or I saw her pictures, I loved her even more. If she was somebody else, I will probably have told her about my feelings for her, but she is suppose to be in a relationship with my Best friend "T".
 I believe asking her out will amount to betraying the confidence and trust of My Best-Friend, although they never dated, and I don't see that happening soon, but then even if I date get to date her, I have this premonition, that she'll always compare me to "T" which might prove disastrous for our relationship, and cause constant conflict between "T" and I, which is something I'll rather avoid.
If I was to advice someone else who was in this same predicament, it may be easy doing that, but right now, I've decided to keep shunning my feelings, and remain best of friends with both "T" and "F". And this has also made me have a change of heart in the way I give people relationship advice.